Villains Outreach Program
by Carres1220
Summary: When Dumbledore invents a club known as the V.O.P romantic sparks and humorous situations follow. Draco is a spoiled and self pitying albeit comical hero and Hermione becomes his sassy love interest.


Draco sat brooding at the Slytherin table. Most days he preferred lounging but the dreary afternoon called for _brooding_. He sighed and dramatically tossed a blonde lock out of his face.

Goyle stared at him from across the table and though he didn't quite care asked the obligatory question, "What's wrong Draco?"

Draco sighed again, "Oh nothing."

But there was contradiction written all over his handsome features. Goyle and Crabbe really didn't want to know but their fathers paid handsome bribes for them to remain close friends to the notoriously melodramatic Malfoy heir. So the two persisted.

"No really mate. What is it?" Goyle repeated without even looking up from his lunch.

"I'm just so _bored_." was Draco's reply.

"Go pick on the mudbloods," Crabbe suggested.

"God no," Draco pushed away his untouched plate of food, "That's getting so _old_."

Crabbe shrugged and desisted in his ideas. He didn't know much about school but he knew when Draco was in no mood to be comforted. Malfoy was spoiled rotten and the consequences of having every desire fulfilled were starting to catch up with him.

The war was over and his father had managed to fly under the radar and avoid any kind of just punishment. He escaped with a light slap on the wrist, fortune intact and a somewhat tarnished reputation especially when everyone found out that Voldermort and Lucius were lovers. Of course the authorities realized that when all of the magical tabloids showed shots of Lucius and Voldermort engaged in a passionate embrace that this was probably punishment enough. Sure enough, Lucius remained out of the public eye for the next year emerging only after Narcissa had dragged him out to a charity ball under the threat that if he didn't go she would leave him for Remus Lupin, who she was having a rather open affair with. Now Lucius was out in the open taking an active interest in the magical version of the muggle stock market and his son's academic career much to Draco's disgust. Draco was receiving daily letters from his father inquiring about his extracurricular activities and grades. Lucius was determined that Draco go down the right path and restore honor to the Malfoy name that still evoked fear in some but was really starting to become a joke.

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Draco,

I heard Hogwarts was looking into forming a Gardening Club. Perhaps you should become involved. It would really clear up any discretion people may have about your family's **previous **dark arts background.

L.M.

Along with this note were many others that pushed Draco to participate in domestic activites. To these suggestions Draco always rolled his eyes. He was perfectly content living in his mediocre existence except when he felt like romanticizing his very dull life. On these occasions he was known to sulk in the tall towers of Hogwarts and write very bad poetry. However, the evil Draco never really disappeared but as he grew older people started to take him a little less seriously. Still the legend of the malevolent Malfoy never died. He took great pleasure in insulting others and flaunting his position in life. Often though when he would tease others, no matter who it was, Potter and Weasley would come to the rescue and bring up the fact that Malfoy had a fag for a dad. For example, one morning when Draco was harassing a small witch from Hufflepuff "Tweedle Dumb" and "Tweedle Dumber" interrupted him.

__

Draco really needed to let some steam out and this little girl had been serving his purpose. The insults were coming splendidly. Malfoy was really in top form this morning.

"God you are so fat," he said, "Do you fill the tub and then turn on the water and please do not even get me started on your bloody second rate robes. Seriously, you should be ashamed."

The little Hufflepuff's eyes were watering with tears until the Gryffindors came to her rescue. They were walking past and heard Malfoy's incessant whine. Curious, they approached.

"Oy, " Harry called when he saw what was going on, "At least her daddy's not a bloody queer."

Draco's back stiffened and he paused in his tirade.

"Yeah Malfoy and from the look of your popped collar it looks like fag runs in the family," Ron continued.

"For your information popped collars on robes are very fashionable in the States," Draco sputtered, "And at least I can afford collars on my clothing. That's more than you can say Weasel."

But Harry and Ron were laughing and even the Hufflepuff had cracked a small grin. Draco marched away, clenching and unclenching his fists.

From that point on he tried to slink by Harry and Ron, who were still the only ones brave enough to remind Draco of his father's dishonorable indiscretion.

Meanwhile, the aforementioned Gryffindor hooligans were snickering at Draco from across the dining hall. Draco sneered back and stood quickly. He was in no mood for their shenanigans. He unhooked part of his robes so that they would billow menacingly. Unfortunately, part of the robes caught on a stray chair and he tripped, falling to his knees. Only a few Gryffindors saw the mishap but the Gryffindors who did see were none other than the Golden Trio and their groupies. They burst into laughter.

"Looks like you do follow in your da's footsteps," Seamus Finnigan shouted, "Already on your knees!"

Draco fumed and tried to stand as disdainfully as possible, "Well you're all bloody poor." he muttered and stalked out of the dining hall. A tapping on a nearby window distracted him. It was his father's owl.

"Oh this is just fantastic," Draco said and let the imposing bird in. He stuck out his claw and Draco unrolled the expensive parchment.

_Draco,_

I've found the perfect club for you to join. I took the liberty of enrolling you already so you do not need to make any arrangements. It's called the Villain's Outreach Program or the V.O.P. Naturally you will listen to my command or else suffer the severe consequences.

L.M.

Draco flung up his arms in disgust. This was just another delightful way to continue his day. He'd probably have to reach out and hug some of his father's old cronies. Hopefully, Voldermort wouldn't be one of the villains that needed to be part of the V.O.P. Draco was sure Voldermort wouldn't be too happy about Lucius abandoning him in prison. Although he was sure that Dumbledore wouldn't let any harm come to his students, Draco was skeptical about the club his father was pushing him into. The sound of laughing voices interrupted his thoughts and Draco melted into the shadows so he could avoid any sort of confrontation. His eyes narrowed at the sight of Potter's groupies.

"Yeah I really think I'll join just so I can flaunt my superiority in defeating Voldermort," Harry was snickering.

Hermione wagged her finger at him, "That's not very hero like Harry."

The Boy Who Lived shrugged his shoulders, "I've had to deal with them for my whole life and I think I deserve this one thing."

Ron threw his gangly arms around their shoulders, "Yeah Mione. Let Harry 'ave a bit of fun."

Draco winced at Ron's use of bad language and was secretly glad when he heard Hermione admonishing the improper grammar. He emerged from his hiding spot and watched the three disappear around a turn. So it looks like he wouldn't be the only one participating in the V.O.P. It might actually be a little entertaining to watch Dumbledore's Dick Suckers get put in their place by some petty criminals. He would wait and see.

Okay, well let me know what you think. This really just serves as an introduction and than I'll write a longer chapter I promise! Cross my heart beyatches


End file.
